A Wanderer's Journey: Equestrian Chronicle
by Medlimakar
Summary: T.J. is an average guy with a very unusual problem. He is a Wanderer. Like a Traveler, he has strange powers and is practically immortal. Unlike a Traveler, he has no choice of where or when he goes. Join him and his companion, Umbra, as they try to figure out what their supposed to do in a land of magical, talking, marshmallow ponies and cause havoc where ever they go.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter the First: Arrival

All characters, concepts, and settings are © & TM their respective owners. No infringement is intended by the author.

"Speech"

_'Thought'_

_"Telepathic speech"_

A bright flash was seen in the skies, out-shining the glare coming off of the gilded rooftops of the castle towers, which seemed to sprout from the mountain side like some sort of exotic mushroom. When the flash had faded, two figures could be seen "falling with style" from a pulsating rift which, having fulfilled its purpose, vanished. If anypony had been close enough, they would have noted that, strangely enough, the larger of the two was sitting astride the smaller, and that both were screaming in absolute terror, their eyes still closed from flash that had brought them to the land. Eventually, they decided that screaming wasn't going to keep them from adding a new feature to the local topography. So they then began discussing ways in which they could safely land. Though anyone close enough to hear them would not have understood them, for not only they did not speak the native language, but they also communicated with each other telepathically.

_"Why, damn it! Why do I always have to appear in the freaking SKY! Just ONCE I'd like to go somewhere new without digging a trench with my FACE!"_ The larger said to his companion who, until recently had been the larger of the two.

_"You mean this is normal for you? I did NOT sign up for this!"_ The smaller screeched, her wings futilely flapping in hopes of slowing their descent. _"Can't you do something about this?"_ She asked in a somewhat calmer tone.

_"I would if I could, believe me, but I can't." _ The larger one said, his equipment rattling in the wind. _"I'm not attuned to the local leylines yet, and until I am we'll have to rely on our wits."_ He explained. _"At least you have wings."_

_"Fat lot of good they're doing, you're far too heavy for me carry for some reason." _She said humorlessly. Her face brightened suddenly, having just hatched an idea. _"I've got it!"_ She mentally shouted, getting her Rider's attention. _"If you hop off, I can grab you in my claws and carry you like one of those silly horses your kind seems to enjoy riding."_ She then flexed her claws experimentally only to find that she couldn't, it was then that she opened her eyes to find that her scaled snout had been replaced with a furred muzzle. "WHAT, WHY AM I FLUFFY?!" She yelled vocally, surprising them both.

Her companion then opened his own eyes to see what his friend's outburst was about, only to find his vision obstructed by a black tipped snout. _"Well that's new."_ He stated as if it were completely normal to have such a change occur. He then looked at his partner only to find that she appeared to be a diminutive, cartoonish horse. _"If I not mistaken, you're a Pegasus, a talking Pegasus." _

The Pegasus, formerly known as Umbra Darkscales, turned her head to look at him and saw what looked like something she and her Rider would have been sent to destroy. _"Well, if I'm a Pegasus, what the hell are you?"_ she asked. _"You look like the result of a mating session between a man and a cow." _She said, looking at his lean human torso and bovine head.

T.J., formerly a decent example of an elven male, snorted in a very bovine fashion before looking at his own body, starting at the bottom and working his way up from there. _"It would seem that I'm a Minotaur, horns, hooves, and all." _He said as if he were teaching a class. He also noted that his various bandoliers, belts, and pouches had shifted to fit his new shape. _"Let's edit your plan; it should still work even with hooves."_ He then noticed what seemed to be a temple built out of white marble on the snow covered ground below. _"Do you think that you can make it to that temple over there?"_ Knowing that, linked as they were, he did not need to point at it.

_"I think so."_ she replied, gauging the distance with her eyes. _"It'll be a rough landing though." _

They then acted on their plan. TJ leaped off Umbra's back and she hooked him under the arms with her forelegs, flapping her wings furiously to slow their fall to speed that was less potentially hazardous to one's health, though it was still going to be a rough landing.

They ended up crashing into and _though_ the wall of the allegedly stone temple landing in what looked like a living room. It was furnished for a creature of similar size to Umbra. The strangest part was that everything seemed to be made out of clouds; the walls, celling, and floor were all made from unusually solid clouds. They then heard what sounded like someone abusing a xylophone with a rubber mallet, followed by the sound of a door slamming open and someone coming down the stairs that led to the second floor. T.J. and Umbra both hid behind a nearby couch, TJ's head peeking around the side so he could see what manner of creature could make such noises.

* * *

_'I swear, if there's anything broke, I'm gonna buck em offa my porch.'_ Rainbow Dash thought as she came to the stairs. When she came into the living room she froze, shocked at the amount of damage that had been done. It looked like a tornado had hit, her reading table was shattered, there were _Daring Do_ books everywhere, there was even a chair embedded in the wall opposite a HUGE hole big enough for the Royal chariot to fly through. She then noticed the black pony tail poking out from behind the couch. "I see you back there! Come on out so I can clobber ya." In response, the pony behind the large and miraculously un-damaged piece of furniture hissed at her and then yelped when a green furred limb shot out and yanked the tail back into hiding.

_'What the hay? There's two of em.'_ she thought, suddenly understanding why there was so much damage. The two Pegasi that were hiding from her had obviously been getting lovey-dovey while flying, which would explain why they hadn't seen her house. They were hiding from her because they were embarrassed. Who wouldn't be in a situation like that? Fairly young as well. An experienced flyer wouldn't have done something like that. _'OK, maybe a clobbering followed by forced take-off isn't such a good idea?' _

"OK, I'm not gonna hurt ya, just come out." She said gently. After all, she did have a soft spot for kids. Rainbow saw something poke out from behind the couch and a Pegasus mare slowly came out into the open. The thinly built mare's coat was shockingly black and her mane and tail were somehow even blacker, seeming to absorb the light in the room. Her cutie mark was the strangest thing she had ever seen, a florescent green flame. That in and of itself was odd, but she could swear that the flame was real as though it was constantly moving. The strange mare then wordlessly beckoned to her friend, who had yet to come out. Rainbow was not expecting what happened next. She had expected to see a green stallion come out and stand beside the mare; instead a hand came up and waved in a manner that suggested its owner's surrender. A pair of horns then rose up from behind the couch, followed by the head and shoulders of a biped. "The buck…?"


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter the Second: Contact

All characters, concepts, and settings are © & TM their respective owners. No infringement is intended by the author.

"Speech"

_'Thought'_

_"Telepathic speech"_

T.J. looked at the strange creature with an expression on his face that mirrored the one on its own. Standing in the doorway that led to the rest of the house was another Pegasus, but unlike Umbra, her mane and coat were vastly different colors. The mare's coat was sky blue, while her mane and tail could only be described as 'rainbow' colored. The 'pony', as he had decided to call the small equine, moved her mouth and the sound that he had heard earlier seemed to come from it. Though this time it wasn't as harsh and sounded almost melodic. "Well isn't this a surprise, a winged pony that speaks xylophone."T.J. said with a laugh, gesturing towards the pony, who jumped at the sound. The language of man probably sounded like primal grunting to her. He then took a step towards the rainbow Pegasus, she took two steps back.

_"She seems to be afraid of you." _Umbra said telepathically, not wanting to scare the native pony any more, the poor creature looked ready to keel over in fright as it was. _"Maybe I should try to convince her that we mean her no harm? After all, I am the same species as her." _She continued, looking up at T.J. She then realized just how tall her friend was. _"And you might want to sit down_. _You're at least six feet tall, not counting the horns, and she's only two foot at the shoulder." _T.J. then began to slowly lower himself to the ground, and that's when the terrified native charged.

* * *

Rainbow Dash didn't know how the Minotaur was standing on the clouds, but he wasn't going to be standing on them much longer. She charged the beast as he sat down, knowing that he'd be easier to knock over. The black mare moved to intercept her so she took to the air, easily avoiding the tackle. _'Is she trying to protect _him _from_ me_?'_ Rainbow thought, just before she was knocked to the ground. She tried to get up only to find that she was pinned down by the mare. "What the hay are you doing? Get off me, I'm trying to help you, you crazy mare!" The mare on her back replied with an inequine hiss, which the Minotaur seemed to understand. He made a strange series of noises and her assailant got off of her with hiss that, judging by tone, meant something along the lines of 'Well, alright, if you say so.'

As soon as she was free, Rainbow pinned the black mare to the cloud floor, reversing their previous positions. The now pinned mare hissed violently, snapping at her hooves. A forceful tap to the nose put a stop to that. Suddenly Rainbow Dash felt very unsafe, much like she had when Princess Celestia sent the Elements of Harmony to deal with a napping dragon. She looked up to find the Minotaur's face a mere hoof away from her own. She then, in a perfect imitation of one of her friends, let out a terrified 'EEP!' and bolted…face first into an overturned table.

* * *

T.J. looked at the now unconscious pony. _'It would seem that Umbra was right, our native friend is scared of me.'_ He thought. "Umbra, come over here and check her for a pulse, I figure it'll be less traumatic if she wakes up with you near her rather than me."

"Yeah, I think that's a good idea, we don't want her to keel over after all." She said, before placing an ear on the rainbow Pegasus's chest. "She's alive and, as far as I can tell, she should be OK." She then stood and then gestured toward the hole with a wing. "We should leave now Tac, before she wakes."

_'Oh crap, any time she uses more than my initials she means business.'_ T.J. thought worriedly. "OK, let's get out of here before she wakes…" He was interrupted by a somewhat groggy groan. "Damn it, too late."

* * *

_'What the hay, why's my head hurt so much? I don't remember going to a Pinkie Pie Party last night.'_ Rainbow thought as she waited for her vision to clear. "Huh, why does it look like a twister went through my living room?" She then shot to her hooves, remembering that she had uninvited guests. She turned and saw them trying to sneak out through the hole they'd punched in the wall.

"Oh no you don't, you ain't getting away that easily!" She said, launching herself at the Minotaur. Just before impact the beast sidestepped out of her path, grabbing her tail as she flew past. She yelped in pain and surprise when he suddenly yanked her back. He then twirled her over his head a few times before throwing her out of her house. She spun through the air for several meters before landing on the clouds in a tangled heap. Once she had stood and gotten her bearings she dashed back to her house, intent on returning the favor, this time she wasn't going to hold back. She literally stormed through the hole, ready to kick ass and get answers, only to find her home vacant. Her shrieks of rage and annoyance were heard in Canterlot.

* * *

Four weeks later

Apple Jack stood beside her cart in the Ponyville market watching the townsponies as they shopped. Lyra was sitting in her usual fashion on a nearby park bench playing her lyre, Derpy was blundering trough her mail route, and Carrot Top was attempting to conceal a pitchfork in her cart, which she had used to fend off the horde of rabbits. "Well, it's gettin bout that time a day." She said to herself, noting the angle of the sun. She then began to pack up her wares when she heard somepony galloping towards her. She turned to see one of her more unusual customers skidding to a stop a meter or so away.

This one in particular was very odd. The mare, who A.J. assumed to be an Earth pony, wore a strange hooded gray-green cloak that bore a random pattern of green and brown splotches and had yet to say word to anypony in the three weeks since she had started coming into town. Even stranger was the fact that either Pinkie hadn't thrown a party for her yet or A.J. had somehow missed it. In fact, it was as if the newcomer could completely avoid the party-crazed mare at will. "Cuttin it a might close, ain't we." A.J. said with a bemused look on her face.

"Sorry Miss Apple, there was a line outside Sugar Cube Corner that completely blocked the street, so I had to take a detour. I'd like ten of your best apples please." The cloaked mare said in a Trottingham accent.

Applejack did a double take. "Uh, pardon me Miss but, did ya just talk? Ah thought ya 'all was a mute, considerin ah hadn't heard ya say anythin' ta anypony."

"No, I'm just a mare of few words. By the way, my name is Umbra." The mare said, extending a hoof which A.J. grabbed for one of her usual 'death grip' hoofshakes.

She was pleasantly surprised when Umbra wasn't even fazed by the strength of her grip. "Ten apples ya say, that'll be twenty bits. Ain't ya 'all hot under that there cloak? Ah reckon ya must be roastin' in that thing."

"Oh no, I'm fine. It's made of a very light cloth. That and I don't like to have stallions staring at my flank all day." Umbra replied, before pulling the required money from a strangely decorated wallet.

"That's mighty fancy wallet ya got there. Ah don't reckon Ah've ever seen one like it." A.J. remarked setting out the apples.

"Yea, it's one of kind. My partner picked it up during one of his earlier journeys." Umbra said, putting the apples into her saddlebag.

"_His, _ya say? So ya got yer self a stallion." A.J. said with a smirk.

Umbra recoiled and her cheeks visibly reddened. "What? No, he's like a brother to me. He's taken care of me since I was little, he practically raised me."

"Well, Ah need to get home. Ah guess Ah'll see ya tomorrow."

"Yeah, see you tomorrow." Umbra replied. She then turned to leave when somepony yelled so loudly that Princess Luna herself would have covered her ears.

**"STOP HER, APPLEJACK! DON'T LET HER GET AWAY!" **

A.J. turned and saw a pink blur streaking towards her at a speed that would have impressed Rainbow Dash. The pink missile came to an abrupt stop, and in its place stood a certain baker.

"Aw, why'd ya let her get away A.J.? I haven't given her a welcoming party yet. How does she do that?" Pinkie Pie said.

"What are ya going on about Pinkie, she's right…" A.J. said, pointing at the empty space recently occupied by Umbra "Well Ah'll be she must a slipped away somehow."

"Why didn't ya grab her, or stall her A.J.?"

"OK. First off Pinks, Ah ain't grabbing nopony without a good reason. Second; Ah need to pack up shop so Ah go home, Ah _would_ like to get back to the farm before dark after all."

"Okie dokie lokie, I gotta get back to the Corner, its Mega Muffin Monday and the pre-closing rush will be starting soon, see ya 'round A.J."

* * *

Two ponies walked though Whitetail Woods, the one in front stopping occasionally to wave around a stick, the second one complaining all the while.

"I'm tired. I want to go home. It's getting dark. What are we even doing out here?"

"I already told you, my faithful assistant. There's alien tech somewhere out here. We are going to find it and, more importantly, whoever is using it."

"But Doctor, its Mega Muff…"

"Quiet, do you here that, Miss Do?"

"You mean that singing?"

"Yes, the signal is strongest in that direction, allons-y!" The Doctor exclaimed, before galloping off towards the sound.

Ditzy took off after him. After all, it _was_ her job to keep him out of trouble. She found him at the edge of a clearing, which seemed to be some sort of construction site. A strange squat building, which was nearly completed, stood in the center of the clearing. The only obvious source of the singing, which had stopped, was a lightly built green Minotaur, who was surrounded by dozens of flying tools and objects that Ditzy could only classify as 'other'. All of which seemed to obey his will, a hammer going one way, and an obscenely large wrench another.

Ditzy nearly jumped when a large, cylindrical object began rolling across the clearing, coming to a stop next to the Minotaur, who lowered it into a hole in the ground. A trio of shovels peeled off of the maelstrom of construction implements and filled in the hole. He then directed the tools towards a bag sitting near the edifice, which they all flew into, somehow fitting. He began to sing again while walking around the structure, opening various panels.

_Watch as I work my Traveler's magic,_

_Tesseract construction means more space._

_Oh so many toggles, the mind they boggle._

_Soon, I'll be at home in this place._

"There you are, you naughty little switch. I really should label these things." The Minotaur said, flipping a switch on the side of the building. An unusual droning sound filled the air and the odd structure took on the appearance of a grassy hill with windows, a chimney, and a round door.

"There, a hobbit hole fit for a king." The Minotaur said, picking up the bag before entering the house.

"Well, that was unexpected. Let's have a look around, see what we can out about this guy." The Doctor said, stepping into the clearing.

"Uh, I'm not so sure that's a good id…" Ditzy started, before a loud alarm sounded.

"Unregistered sentient beings detected, dispatching security personnel." An uninterested voice said, seeming to come from the hill.

"Um, Doctor, shouldn't we leave before the guards show up?" Ditzy said while backing up.

"No Ditzy, we're staying. I'm starting to think this fellow may be an off-worlder. He has highly advanced technology, stuff this planet shouldn't have for another thousand years at least. And if he has guards, then he has something to hide."

Ditzy watched as The Doctor went farther into the clearing. He stopped suddenly, his ears swiveling to pick up some sound that she couldn't hear.

"Oh no…" The Doctor said, backing away from the building. A strange creature came into view; it's one glowing, blue eye locking onto The Doctor.

"INTRUDERS SIGHTED. YOU WILL IDENTIFY YOURSELVES." yelled the creature, the two small lights on its domed head flashing.

"Ditzy, run, I'll try to hold it off!" The Doctor yelled, pulling out his sonic screwdriver and pointing it at the metallic beast.

But she couldn't move; her body had locked up with sheer terror. For as long as she had known him, The Doctor had been fearless, staring down horrifying beasts, literally laughing in the face of death. But now, the fear was apparent in his voice. And if he was scared of this thing, then what kind of creature was it?

"HOSTILTITY DETECTED. INCPACITATE, IN-CA-PAC-I-TATE!" The thing screamed, seemingly incapable of speaking at any other volume, before firing a beam from one of its two arms.

Ditzy watched as the energy bolt raced towards her. When it impacted, she felt strangely relaxed, as if there were nothing wrong in the world. The last thing saw before the darkness overtook her was The Doctor being taken down by a similar beam, a look of abject horror on his face.

Chapter the Second: Contact

All characters, concepts, and settings are © & TM their respective owners. No infringement is intended by the author.

"Speech"

_'Thought'_

_"Telepathic speech"_

T.J. looked at the strange creature with an expression on his face that mirrored the one on its own. Standing in the doorway that led to the rest of the house was another Pegasus, but unlike Umbra, her mane and coat were vastly different colors. The mare's coat was sky blue, while her mane and tail could only be described as 'rainbow' colored. The 'pony', as he had decided to call the small equine, moved her mouth and the sound that he had heard earlier seemed to come from it. Though this time it wasn't as harsh and sounded almost melodic. "Well isn't this a surprise, a winged pony that speaks xylophone."T.J. said with a laugh, gesturing towards the pony, who jumped at the sound. The language of man probably sounded like primal grunting to her. He then took a step towards the rainbow Pegasus, she took two steps back.

_"She seems to be afraid of you." _Umbra said telepathically, not wanting to scare the native pony any more, the poor creature looked ready to keel over in fright as it was. _"Maybe I should try to convince her that we mean her no harm? After all, I am the same species as her." _She continued, looking up at T.J. She then realized just how tall her friend was. _"And you might want to sit down_. _You're at least six feet tall, not counting the horns, and she's only two foot at the shoulder." _T.J. then began to slowly lower himself to the ground, and that's when the terrified native charged.

Perspective Shift

Rainbow Dash didn't know how the Minotaur was standing on the clouds, but he wasn't going to be standing on them much longer. She charged the beast as he sat down, knowing that he'd be easier to knock over. The black mare moved to intercept her so she took to the air, easily avoiding the tackle. _'Is she trying to protect _him _from_ me_?'_ Rainbow thought, just before she was knocked to the ground. She tried to get up only to find that she was pinned down by the mare. "What the hay are you doing? Get off me, I'm trying to help you, you crazy mare!" The mare on her back replied with an inequine hiss, which the Minotaur seemed to understand. He made a strange series of noises and her assailant got off of her with hiss that, judging by tone, meant something along the lines of 'Well, alright, if you say so.'

As soon as she was free, Rainbow pinned the black mare to the cloud floor, reversing their previous positions. The now pinned mare hissed violently, snapping at her hooves. A forceful tap to the nose put a stop to that. Suddenly Rainbow Dash felt very unsafe, much like she had when Princess Celestia sent the Elements of Harmony to deal with a napping dragon. She looked up to find the Minotaur's face a mere hoof away from her own. She then, in a perfect imitation of one of her friends, let out a terrified 'EEP!' and bolted…face first into an overturned table.

Perspective Shift

T.J. looked at the now unconscious pony. _'It would seem that Umbra was right, our native friend is scared of me.'_ He thought. "Umbra, come over here and check her for a pulse, I figure it'll be less traumatic if she wakes up with you near her rather than me."

"Yeah, I think that's a good idea, we don't want her to keel over after all." She said, before placing an ear on the rainbow Pegasus's chest. "She's alive and, as far as I can tell, she should be OK." She then stood and then gestured toward the hole with a wing. "We should leave now Tac, before she wakes."

_'Oh crap, any time she uses more than my initials she means business.'_ T.J. thought worriedly. "OK, let's get out of here before she wakes…" He was interrupted by a somewhat groggy groan. "Damn it, too late."

Perspective Shift

_'What the hay, why's my head hurt so much? I don't remember going to a Pinkie Pie Party last night.'_ Rainbow thought as she waited for her vision to clear. "Huh, why does it look like a twister went through my living room?" She then shot to her hooves, remembering that she had uninvited guests. She turned and saw them trying to sneak out through the hole they'd punched in the wall.

"Oh no you don't, you ain't getting away that easily!" She said, launching herself at the Minotaur. Just before impact the beast sidestepped out of her path, grabbing her tail as she flew past. She yelped in pain and surprise when he suddenly yanked her back. He then twirled her over his head a few times before throwing her out of her house. She spun through the air for several meters before landing on the clouds in a tangled heap. Once she had stood and gotten her bearings she dashed back to her house, intent on returning the favor, this time she wasn't going to hold back. She literally stormed through the hole, ready to kick ass and get answers, only to find her home vacant. Her shrieks of rage and annoyance were heard in Canterlot.

Perspective Shift

Four weeks later

Apple Jack stood beside her cart in the Ponyville market watching the townsponies as they shopped. Lyra was sitting in her usual fashion on a nearby park bench playing her lyre, Derpy was blundering trough her mail route, and Carrot Top was attempting to conceal a pitchfork in her cart, which she had used to fend off the horde of rabbits. "Well, it's gettin bout that time a day." She said to herself, noting the angle of the sun. She then began to pack up her wares when she heard somepony galloping towards her. She turned to see one of her more unusual customers skidding to a stop a meter or so away.

This one in particular was very odd. The mare, who A.J. assumed to be an Earth pony, wore a strange hooded gray-green cloak that bore a random pattern of green and brown splotches and had yet to say word to anypony in the three weeks since she had started coming into town. Even stranger was the fact that either Pinkie hadn't thrown a party for her yet or A.J. had somehow missed it. In fact, it was as if the newcomer could completely avoid the party-crazed mare at will. "Cuttin it a might close, ain't we." A.J. said with a bemused look on her face.

"Sorry Miss Apple, there was a line outside Sugar Cube Corner that completely blocked the street, so I had to take a detour. I'd like ten of your best apples please." The cloaked mare said in a Trottingham accent.

Applejack did a double take. "Uh, pardon me Miss but, did ya just talk? Ah thought ya 'all was a mute, considerin ah hadn't heard ya say anythin' ta anypony."

"No, I'm just a mare of few words. By the way, my name is Umbra." The mare said, extending a hoof which A.J. grabbed for one of her usual 'death grip' hoofshakes.

She was pleasantly surprised when Umbra wasn't even fazed by the strength of her grip. "Ten apples ya say, that'll be twenty bits. Ain't ya 'all hot under that there cloak? Ah reckon ya must be roastin' in that thing."

"Oh no, I'm fine. It's made of a very light cloth. That and I don't like to have stallions staring at my flank all day." Umbra replied, before pulling the required money from a strangely decorated wallet.

"That's mighty fancy wallet ya got there. Ah don't reckon Ah've ever seen one like it." A.J. remarked setting out the apples.

"Yea, it's one of kind. My partner picked it up during one of his earlier journeys." Umbra said, putting the apples into her saddlebag.

"_His, _ya say? So ya got yer self a stallion." A.J. said with a smirk.

Umbra recoiled and her cheeks visibly reddened. "What? No, he's like a brother to me. He's taken care of me since I was little, he practically raised me."

"Well, Ah need to get home. Ah guess Ah'll see ya tomorrow."

"Yeah, see you tomorrow." Umbra replied. She then turned to leave when somepony yelled so loudly that Princess Luna herself would have covered her ears.

**"STOP HER, APPLEJACK! DON'T LET HER GET AWAY!" **

A.J. turned and saw a pink blur streaking towards her at a speed that would have impressed Rainbow Dash. The pink missile came to an abrupt stop, and in its place stood a certain baker.

"Aw, why'd ya let her get away A.J.? I haven't given her a welcoming party yet. How does she do that?" Pinkie Pie said.

"What are ya going on about Pinkie, she's right…" A.J. said, pointing at the empty space recently occupied by Umbra "Well Ah'll be she must a slipped away somehow."

"Why didn't ya grab her, or stall her A.J.?"

"OK. First off, Pinks, Ah ain't grabbing nopony without a good reason. Second; Ah need to pack up shop so Ah go home, Ah _would_ like to get back to the farm before dark after all."

"Okie dokie lokie, I gotta get back to the Corner, its Mega Muffin Monday and the pre-closing rush will be starting soon, see ya 'round A.J."

Perspective Shift

Two ponies walked though Whitetail Woods, the one in front stopping occasionally to wave around a stick, the second one complaining all the while.

"I'm tired. I want to go home. It's getting dark. What are we even doing out here?"

"I already told you, my faithful assistant. There's alien tech somewhere out here. We are going to find it and, more importantly, whoever is using it."

"But Doctor, its Mega Muff…"

"Quiet, do you here that, Miss Do?"

"You mean that singing?"

"Yes, the signal is strongest in that direction, allons-y!" The Doctor exclaimed, before galloping off towards the sound.

Ditzy took off after him. After all, it _was_ her job to keep him out of trouble. She found him at the edge of a clearing, which seemed to be some sort of construction site. A strange squat building, which was nearly completed, stood in the center of the clearing. The only obvious source of the singing, which had stopped, was a lightly built green Minotaur, who was surrounded by dozens of flying tools and objects that Ditzy could only classify as 'other'. All of which seemed to obey his will, a hammer going one way, and an obscenely large wrench another.

Ditzy nearly jumped when a large, cylindrical object began rolling across the clearing, coming to a stop next to the Minotaur, who lowered it into a hole in the ground. A trio of shovels peeled off of the maelstrom of construction implements and filled in the hole. He then directed the tools towards a bag sitting near the edifice, which they all flew into, somehow fitting. He began to sing again while walking around the structure, opening various panels.

_Watch as I work my Traveler's magic,_

_Tesseract construction means more space._

_Oh so many toggles, the mind they boggle._

_Soon, I'll be at home in this place._

"There you are, you naughty little switch. I really should label these things." The Minotaur said, flipping a switch on the side of the building. An unusual droning sound filled the air and the odd structure took on the appearance of a grassy hill with windows, a chimney, and a round door.

"There, a hobbit hole fit for a king." The Minotaur said, picking up the bag before entering the house.

"Well, that was unexpected. Let's have a look around, see what we can out about this guy." The Doctor said, stepping into the clearing.

"Uh, I'm not so sure that's a good id…" Ditzy started, before a loud alarm sounded.

"Unregistered sentient beings detected, dispatching security personnel." An uninterested voice said, seeming to come from the hill.

"Um, Doctor, shouldn't we leave before the guards show up?" Ditzy said while backing up.

"No Ditzy, we're staying. I'm starting to think this fellow may be an off-worlder. He has highly advanced technology, stuff this planet shouldn't have for another thousand years at least. And if he has guards, then he has something to hide."

Ditzy watched as The Doctor went farther into the clearing. He stopped suddenly, his ears swiveling to pick up some sound that she couldn't hear.

"Oh no…" The Doctor said, backing away from the building. A strange creature came into view; it's one glowing, blue eye locking onto The Doctor.

"INTRUDERS SIGHTED. YOU WILL IDENTIFY YOURSELVES." yelled the creature, the two small lights on its domed head flashing.

"Ditzy, run, I'll try to hold it off!" The Doctor yelled, pulling out his sonic screwdriver and pointing it at the metallic beast.

But she couldn't move; her body had locked up with sheer terror. For as long as she had known him, The Doctor had been fearless, staring down horrifying beasts, literally laughing in the face of death. But now, the fear was apparent in his voice. And if he was scared of this thing, then what kind of creature was it?

"HOSTILTITY DETECTED. INCPACITATE, IN-CA-PA-CI-TATE!" The thing screamed, seemingly incapable of speaking at any other volume, before firing a beam from one of its two arms.

Ditzy watched as the energy bolt raced towards her. When it impacted, she felt strangely relaxed, as if there were nothing wrong in the world. The last thing saw before the darkness overtook her was The Doctor being taken down by a similar beam, a look of abject horror on his face.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three: Discovery

All characters, concepts, and settings are © & TM their respective owners. No infringement is intended by the author.

"Speech"

_'Thought'_

_"Telepathic speech"_

_'Bloody hell, what happened? The last thing I remember was that Dalek shooting at'… _"Ditzy!" The Doctor jerked into full awareness and attempted to stand, only to find that he had been bound, belly down, to a table.

_'Well this is quite a predicament.' _he thought, looking around the darkened room, which was lit by a fire at one end. He saw Ditzy bound in like manner on table to his left, her wings secured with a belt. She was looking at him; the one eye he could see seemed to ask the last question he wanted to answer, 'Why?'

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. I never wanted this to happen. I promise you, Ditzy; I _will_ get us out of this."

Her only response was a blink; she seemed to have completely given up.

_'Well, there's nothing I can do while I'm strapped down. Hang on a tick, is that singing I hear?'_

"Boneses and sinew and boneses and flesh, and boneses and sinew and boneses and flesh, and…"

_ 'No, that is most definitely _not_ singing.' _He looked towards the source of the chanting and saw a smallish scruffy looking biped silhouetted in firelight. Disconcertingly enough, the creature was sharpening a large knife on a grindstone as it chanted.

"Excuse me, good sir." The creature perked at the sound of The Doctor's voice. "Yes, you with the knife, would you mind untying me and my friend?"

"Brown pony talk to Scraggle?" the creature said in a 'mad scientist's assistant' voice.

_'Of course, we _would _get captured by Dr. Frankenstein and left to be 'entertained' by his lab assistant.' _"Yes, if you could, please release us? We would be eternally grateful."

"No, ponies stay tied up. Scraggle only listen to Master or Master's companion." Scraggle stated.

Ditzy choose then to speak up. "Can we hurry up with the torture? I'd rather not die of boredom. Or does the fur wad not know how to use that sticker?"

"Ditzy!" The Doctor shouted, shocked at her coarseness. "We don't want to make him mad. He _does_ have a knife, and he most likely knows how to use it."

"Ponies are annoying Scraggle, he will get Master, tell him ponies are awake." and with that, he left through a door to the right of the fireplace.

They sat in silence for a few minutes, neither wanting to say anything. Just as The Doctor was about to say something, he heard a door open behind him.

"Wow, he sure works fast; I wasn't expecting him to be done already. Why are the lights off?" a feminine voice said. A click was heard, followed by the retina searing agony of a suddenly brightened room.

"It burns!" Ditzy wailed as she screwed her eyes shut to shield them from the light.

The Doctor had to agree with her. The stark, white lighting was far brighter than anything the local ponies could produce and did in fact burn his eyes.

"What the hell?" The new comer said, trotting into the room. The Doctor felt something poke his nose; he opened his eyes to see what he assumed was a pony in mottled green and gray hooded cloak standing in front of him, a black furred hoof coming in for another poke.

"Hello there, Miss. You wouldn't happen to be the master of this estate, would you?" The Doctor said, slightly unnerved by the fact that he couldn't see a head within the cloak's hood.

"Uh…" and with that, the obscured mare darted through the door that Scraggle had used. A loud roar tore through the ensuing silence followed by an expensive sounding shatter and heavy hoof steps approaching the door.

"I'm telling you, Umbra. There aren't any…" the door opened to reveal the green furred Minotaur they had seen building the house, his face turned slightly away, his eyes focusing on something or somepony much shorter than him. He then looked into the room. "…ponies in the foyer. Huh? What are you two doing in here?" he said as he walked in, followed by a completely black Pegasus.

"You mean other than losing the feeling in my wings and missing out on the best muffins in town. What time is it anyway?" Ditzy said, her voice lacking its usual cheerfulness.

"It's about 8:26 PM." the Minotaur stated as he loosened the belt securing her wings.

"WHAT!" Ditzy yelled before giving the Doctor a withering glare. "I hope you're happy, Doctor, 'cause now I'll have to wait another yearto get a fresh Mega Muffin."

"Wait a second, did she just call you 'Doctor'." the Minotaur said, pausing as he released The Doctor. He glanced at the stallion's flank, his eyes widening at mark there. "Scraggle, get in here now!"

_'This is not good. Who is this guy? He seems to know who I am. I hope that this doesn't get violent, I don't want Ditzy to get hurt.' _

There was a scrabbling noise outside the room and then Scraggle came running through the door. Now that the lights were on, The Doctor could see that Scraggle was a gray furred, vaguely canine, bipedal creature and was slightly shorter than an average pony.

"What does Master want, Scraggle is trying to prepare munchings and crunchings for evening meal, which will be delayed because black wings pony not bring fixings and mixings to kitchen." Scraggle said, giving the black Pegasus an evil look, to which she replied by sticking out her tongue.

"And what is on the menu tonight, Scraggle?" the Minotaur asked.

"Scraggle has made a fine stew from the sweet and tender flesh of the local pony's flesh*thud*y produce."

All eyes were now on Ditzy, who had been getting off of the table and fallen to the floor where she now lay on her back in an unconscious heap of fur and feathers, twitching slightly.

"By Gorlog's beard Scraggle," the Minotaur said, applying a palm to his forehead. "Do ya think ya coulda worded that better? Back to the kitchen with you, fur ball." the Minotaur commanded, pointing at the door. Scraggle hesitated, raising a finger as if he were about to say something, before leaving.

"Now then, Umbra, would you kindly rearrange her so she isn't belly up? I just so happen to know from experience that is an uncomfortable position for a quadruped to wake up in. Though, considering the fact you've demonstrated flexibility beyond that of a normal equine, I might be wrong."

The Doctor watched as the startlingly black pony walked over to Ditzy gently rolled her over. _'Well, fancy that. A black Pegasus that goes by the name Umbra, how fitting. If she were to stand in the shadows with her eyes closed, she'd be practically invisible.'_ He then turned his attention on the Minotaur. "Have we met before…or later, as the case may be?"

"Yes, I've met you before, but this is apparently your first time meeting me. You know how it is, timey wimey, wibbly wobbly stuff. I would say more, but I know how you are about spoilers." the Minotaur said. "I never thought you'd end up here of all places. I assume the TARDIS brought you here."

"Um, yes it did. If you mind me asking, who are you? Are you a Time Agent or something along those lines?"

"Tell me, Doctor. Have you ever heard of someone being referred to as a 'Traveler'? They are unusual entities that can traverse the gaps between realities at will and often have other strange abilities."

"And, you're one of these 'Travelers' I assume." The Doctor said, tilting his head to one side.

"Ha, I wish I was Traveler. But alas, I am a lowly Wanderer." the Minotaur said.

"And, what is exactly is the difference between 'Travelers' and 'Wanderers'?" The Doctor asked, sitting on his haunches so he could make air quotes with his fore hooves.

"Travelers, if I understand correctly, can go where ever they want, whenever they want. Wanderers, on the other hand, must go where they are needed. Though, just like anyone on a journey, Wanderers can go where they've already been by 'retracing' their steps."

"And do you have a name or title, Wandering Minotaur?"

"Wandering Minotaur, that's a good one." The Minotaur said, stroking the goatee adorning his chin. "Without all the honorifics my name is Tachyon Joule. If I were to add all the honorifics and titles we'd be here till morning. You can call me T.J."

"Um…shouldn't we do something about this one?" Umbra said, nudging Ditzy with a hoof.

"You're absolutely right, partner of my mind and heart." T.J. began rummaging in the various pouches that adorned his belt. "I know it's in here somewhere. Ah ha, here it is!" he exclaimed, pulling out what appeared to be a small controller, its large red button glowing ominously.

"And just what _is_ that, if you don't mind me asking?" The Doctor said, eyeing the button warily.

"As my mother would say, hide and watch." T.J. then extended the antenna, pointed the device at Ditzy and pushed the button.

There was a brief flash that blinded him. Once the spots had cleared from his eyes, The Doctor saw an enormous steaming object sitting in front of Ditzy's nose. "Good heavens! Is that what I think it is? That thing is as large as that Apple stallion!"

T.J. held up a hand. "3…2…1"

"Mu-muffin…**MUFFIN!**" In the blink of an eye, Ditzy was airborne. Quickly sighting her prey, she dove into its brown body, face first, burrowing in upon impact. Her outburst, as well as the obscene nomming noises coming from within the now quivering monument to baked goods, caused everyone, save T.J., to jump and back away.

The Doctor watched in horrified fascination as the muffin continued to tremble and deform in cartoonish ways. A pulsating bulge formed on the near side of the muffin. Then the baked monolith collapsed inwards, its interior having been consumed by the muffin crazed mare. The edible rubble pile rumbled briefly, bringing to mind a volcano signaling its imminent eruption, then quieted.

Slowly, The Doctor stepped towards the steaming mound of crusts and crumbs. "Ditzy, are you alright in there?" A few crumbs shifted, revealing a gray furred ear, which swiveled towards the sound of his voice. A second ear soon followed the first. Moments later, Ditzy's head sprouted from the baked ruble, her cheeks bulging. "I'll take that as a 'yes'."

Ditzy nodded, attempting to chew the large mouthful of muffiny goodness. "That was, without a doubt, the best muffin I've ever had." She looked around, trying to figure out where the treat had come from. "Where'd it come from? I don't see any doors big enough to fit it though."

"Muffin Button." T.J. stated.

"Muffin…Button, what on earth are you talking about?" The Doctor said, flabbergasted. "You have a device that can create a muffin from nothing."

"No, that's impossible. It reweaves the subatomic particles in a given space of air into a muffin."

"A button that makes muffins, where is it? Let me see." Ditzy burst from the pile, showering everyone in crumbs.

"It's right here." T.J. said, pushing the button once more. After a much dimmer flash, which was accompanied by a puff of smoke, a normal sized muffin materialized on the table nearest Ditzy.

"Mine!" Ditzy shouted, pouncing on the muffin.

"Now then," T.J. said, putting the button away as Ditzy savored the smaller muffin. "I believe the two of you need to head home. It might not be the Everfree, but that doesn't mean that it's safe out there after dark."

"What about my screwdriver? I kind of need that."

A floor tile drew attention to itself by flashing red. It then let out a mechanical hiss before dropping slightly and retracting into one of its neighbors. A small pedestal then rose up, the sonic screwdriver on a display stand sitting atop it.

"Well fancy that." The Doctor said, trotting over and grabbing his tool. The pedestal let out a cheerful jingle before returning to its place.

* * *

_ 'Man, I love that jiggle.' _T.J. thought to himself. "Now then, if there are no further queries, Umbra shall escort you back to your village."

"I will? But I just got back. Now I have to go all the way there and back _again. _Can't Miss Do just carry The Doctor and _fly_ back to Ponyville.

"Hey, how do you know my name? Did you tell them my name, Doctor?"

"No, I don't think so." he said, giving Umbra a look of suspicion. "You two seem to know a lot for me to have never seen you in town. Why is that?"

_"Should we tell them?" _Umbra asked T.J. through their link.

_"I don't how we can avoid it after your slip up. That is, unless I use the neuralizer. Besides, they could be useful allies later." _"How shall I put this? Umbra and I are telepaths. We read your minds."

"Telepathy, that's a rare skill. I've never seen it done so effortlessly by one so young. How do we know you're not lying to make yourselves seen more powerful?"

"OK Doctor, first off, you of all beings should know that appearance is not an indicator of age. You're what, a thousand years old? Yet you look like you're in your thirties. Second, you saw me levitating several objects and yet you question my mind powers. Mind reading is among the easiest forms of magic, even those with no innate magic can be taught mind reading. _And lastly, I can prove it like this." _T.J. said, finishing in the Doctor's undefended mind.

"GET OUT! Get out of my head! There are things in there that must _never_ be known!" He bellowed. "Isn't there so sort of order to keep your kind in check?" he said, giving T.J. an accusing glare.

"There was. Umbra and I had to destroy it. They had been secretly practicing necromancy in hopes of gaining enough power to eradicate a rival order, one that had existed for thousands of years, an order that had ended the two greatest wars in that land's history."

"Just what exactly are you? You have abilities I've never seen or heard of and have knowledge of things I've never heard of."

"I already told you, I'm a Wanderer. Don't bother trying to understand me, stronger minds than yours have been institutionalized as a result. One creature, who thought it self to be the smartest being in all of creation, actually _imploded_ trying to understand how I could make a peanut butter taco using a strip of leather, a sentient bowl of petunias, and three tons of deuterium. Another, well, let's just say they won't be cleaning him off of the fabric of that particular universe any time soon." T.J. said with a shiver.

"Uh…how…"

"No, like he said, don't even try to understand anything that comes outta his mouth. My mind is _linked_ with his and even _I_ can't figure him out." Umbra said over her shoulder as she trotted towards the door that led outside.

"I… think I'll just be leaving now, for Ditzy's sake of course." The Doctor said, following Umbra while Ditzy fell in line behind him.

"I can take care of myself, Doctor. I got along fine without you before."

"Oh please, you were probably lost in those woods when you found me."

"Oh yeah, well if it wasn't for me, you'd still be carrying that screwdriver in your mouth, failing miserably at trying to blend in with everypony. Scratch that, you'd probably have ended up lunch for a Manti…" The door closed, cutting her off.

"Thank the Ancestors; I thought I was going to lose it there. I think The Doctor's finally got someone who can keep up with him in an argument." T.J. said, leaving the foyer and heading to the armory.

_'All right, time to see if I can use all of my adventuring gear in this form.' _He opened the door, the lights coming on automatically. He eyed the various implements; each setting in its own rack made to support their sometimes odd forms.

_'Let's see. There's my bow, no need to check that. I already know that I can still use it, my body hasn't changed that much. All I did was grow horns, hooves, fur, and a snout. The Bomb Mask,'_ T.J. shuddered, remembering the incredible destructive power contained within the innocuous chunk of painted wood. _'Never again, I might be able to take a planet to the face from thirty thousand feet, but that thing hurts. Besides, why would want to I blow up my own face when I can just crush an assailant's nads with da Schwartz? Heh, now that was a fun adventure. Ah, the R.Y.N.O., I probably shouldn't use that here. Don't know how the locals would react to several mini-nukes going off. I don't want to look for materials to make the ammo either.' _

He then looked at the other half of the room, where the non-weapon items were located. _'Eye of Truth, no. Double Clawshot, no, I've already had to put one priceless artifact back together; I'd rather not do it again so soon.'_ His thoughts were interrupted by a voice in his head.

_"They're still arguing, why are they still arguing?"_

_"Oh quit your whining, Umbra. It can't be that bad."_

_"It is."_

_"Are they still arguing about the same thing?"_

_"No, now they're arguing about muffins."_

_"Muffins… they're arguing about muffins?"_

_"They're arguing about English muffins, to be exact. The Doctor says that he prefers them over the regular ones, while Ditzy says that they're disgusting. And the worst part is that they keep asking me which I prefer, but I've never had either."_

_"I understand. I'll have some waiting for when you get back."_

_"Thanks, I guess. I wish I could revert into my true form; then I could carry them in my claws. Then again, I don't want to scare anypony."_

_"Yeah, I know what you're saying. I thought those magicians and soldiers back in Ilirea were gonna wet themselves when they found out just how powerful I am. Heh, the look on that one soldier's face when he broke his sword on my arm was priceless. Though, I still feel sorry for that mage who went into my mind to confirm that I wasn't a shade or some other abomination of the sort and had no malicious intentions. I did warn them that it would not end well."_

_"Finally, the edge of town; I was about to start spitting fire. I'll be back soon." _And with that, Umbra left T.J. to his own thoughts.

_'Now then, where was I. Oh yeah, I was going over what I might need to practice with so I'm ready when the horse apples hit the fan. Heh, horse apples, ponies.' _ His eyes then fell upon the object sitting dead center of the room.

There, sitting upon an artfully crafted stand carved from a single piece of nigh indestructible mahogany, was a sword. Its slender blade was hidden in a plain black scabbard. The only sign that it was more than a poor man's instrument of war was the fist-sized black pearl set within the pommel.

"Ah, of course, how could I forget?" He picked it up then unsheathed it, revealing an iridescent black blade. "Schism, the Shadow Rider's blade, meant to be wielded by the chosen warrior of the Gray Folk."

Just as he was about to head to the adjoining training room, he felt a strange tingle. The sensation grew in intensity before disappearing.

"Huh? That was…odd." He said, going through the door. Three steps later, T.J. found himself writhing on the floor in agony. Through their link, he felt Umbra drop out of the sky as his pain reflected to her. Just before he lost consciousness, he severed the link, allowing her to race to his aid.

* * *

_"Come on T.J., answer me. Damn it, Tachyon, answer me!" _Umbra stamped the ground in frustration before launching herself into the air.

Minutes later she was back inside the compound, looking for T.J. She made her way to the training room, knowing that he would be nearby.

As she made her way there, she could see a wavering golden glow emanating from somewhere between her and her goal. _'Fire'_ this thought caused her to pick up her pace considerably.

She rounded the last corner just in time to see Scraggle and a pair of small droids upending buckets onto a body-sized conflagration raging just inside the training room.

**"What in the seven hells is going on here?!"** Umbra yelled, getting Scraggle's attention just he and the bots were about to go for more water.

"You tell Scraggle, you have fire mark." He said, before rushing off for more water.

"I just got here, you fur brained idiot." She said as he disappeared around the corner.

She walked over to a small cabinet set into the wall and pulled out the fire extinguisher therein. _'Why, by Celestia's golden sun, did he not think to use this thing?' _"Ok, how do I use this thing?" After looking at the extinguisher from several angles in an unintentionally adorable manner, the word 'INSTRUCTIONS'**, **printed in bold red letters caught her eye.

_'Oh, would ya look at that, how convenient. Ok, step one; pull pin.' _ She found the pin and pulled it out with her teeth.

_'Step two; aim at base of fire while standing six feet away.' _She eyeballed the distance and made some adjustments before grabbing the nozzle in her mouth.

_'Ok, step three; squeeze lever and sweep side to side. That doesn't seem too hard.'_ Just as she was about to squeeze the lever, she realized something.

"How am I gonna squeeze this lever with a hoof?" Umbra spent the next few minutes trying to figure out how she could both point the nozzle at the small conflagration, which seemed to be dying on its own now, and squeeze the lever at the same time. She finally gave up on using the lever and decided to go with a more manual approach.

The extinguisher was launched into the blaze by the savage buck it received courtesy Umbra's hind legs, where it landed with a soft 'thunk' and a 'clang'.

At that precise moment, Scraggle returned, directing a pair of large droids who bore an even larger fog spewing, frost covered, black caldron between them. The bots, after a nod from Scraggle, raised the caldron up over the fire and inverted it.

Something yelped as the fire was finally extinguished in a cloud of steam and Umbra felt T.J.'s mind flare into existence, as if he had teleported from a great distance. T.J. uttered what Umbra assumed was a foul curse in his native tongue, not that she could understand it.

"Ok," T.J. said from within the mist, which seemed to cling to him. "Why am I cold and wet?" The sound of hooves could be heard as he stood. "And why do I feel like I just got kicked in the face?"

"Heh, sorry about that, T.J., I kicked a fire extinguisher, which may have hit you." Umbra replied sheepishly, scuffing a hoof on the floor.

"Well then, Umbra, would you please disperse this fog. By the way, where did this fog come from, and why did you have an extinguisher out?"

"The fog is Scraggle's doing. You were on fire when I got here. He and a couple of bots were dumping buckets on you. They left, so I tried to use the extinguisher, only to find out that hands, or magic, are needed to use it." Umbra said, taking off and hovering to blow away the mist.

"I was on fire? I was wondering why I felt so drained. Is Scraggle still there?"

"Yeah, he's right h… Where'd he go? He was here a second ago."

"No matter, I'll find him later."

The fog soon dissipated enough for Umbra to barely make out T.J.'s green form, but something seemed off.

"T.J., are you still standing?" Umbra asked, worried that she had hurt him.

"Yeah, why do you ask?"

Umbra answered by flapping her wings more powerfully, causing the somewhat gentle breeze coming off of them to increase into a gale.

"Whoa there, Umbra, take it down a few notches. It's not like the fog is poisonous."

She continued to beat the air with her wings until the fog was no more. She then looked at his definitely shorter form, trembling as she took in the lean muscled body. She landed practically on top of him before she pressed her face against his and stared into his eyes, as if the answer to the question of life, the universe, and everything could be found within their depths. She withdrew suddenly, her eyes wide. Bringing a hoof up, she poked him in the nose.

*boop*

In a non-literal flash, Umbra vanished, causing T.J. to recoil before looking up to find her clinging to the ceiling like a frightened cat. Just as T.J. was about to ask _how_ she was holding onto the ceiling as if she had claws, Umbra yelled at the top of her lungs.

**"Scraggle, what the hell was in that caldron?!"**


End file.
